AWE

My intention this week is to be in awe.

This is a pretty lofty intention for a period where I’ve worked 68 hours instead of 40, and when I discovered, at the last minute, that my boss would be sending me alone…to Chile.

Yes, Chile, the country. Santiago, in fact. I leave–TODAY! (Gulp.) I’m in AWE that a humble little mom of two in rural Vermont is heading to South America–for work.

Not only that, but a car is picking me up and taking me to the airport, and when I arrive in Chile, someone will be standing there with a card that says my name…like you see in the movies.

Do you know the feeling of holding a newborn baby in your arms…

That’s where I’ve been this week.

But don’t forget that newborns are proceeded by pregnancy and indigestion and sleepless nights; and  followed by diapers and colic and many more sleepless nights.

Speaking of sleep, I am in AWE with how little I’ve slept this week.

In fact, I only found the time to write a blog post, because it’s three am.

The night before, I was packing toiletries at 2:30 am;

And the night before that… well, I can’t remember…

I’m also in AWE with just how many midwives fostered this dream–a dream to expand into a larger expression of myself–to travel–to experience culture–to find work that helped provide for all of this… From my fabulous Facebook friends, to my dear blog readers, to my gifted healers and treasured life companions, to my precious family–including siblings and parents and aunts and uncles and cousins and sons and most significantly–husband. Then there’s the school will be looking out for my youngest, and the countless others who shed their light on a stranger’s path.

I am in AWE of how ANGELS abound–like the head nurse and the Episcopalian minister–who made a plan so that my boss could leave her husband’s side and come to work yesterday.

Then there was Elaine–who used to have my job (and did it much more efficiently.)  She tossed aside her life and showed up for two days straight so that everything might be ready for my solo departure.

The tech guy next door pitched in too, giving me an hour, instead of the moments he said he had, so that I’d have the technology I needed to pinch hit for my boss.

To say that this week has been grueling, does not do it justice. It has challenged me on every level, including my ability to develop a wardrobe. But I am in AWE, because at the end of all the preparations (whether or not they were done), I scheduled a massage. I made a plan to leave work at 4:45, the day before the trip, and I went and lied down for an hour, an entire hour, despite all that faced me.

I wanted to tell that massage therapist that she was contributing to world peace–not only inside of my body–but in the lives of the 40 others around the globe who would be meeting me for the first time: People whose line of work is to foster world peace by promoting “The Experiment”, a radical program which began in the 1930s develop understanding and peace through educational travel, cultural experiences and homestays.

Instead, I drooled on her table.

I’m in AWE that I set the intention to be in AWE this week; that I took the time (even after my boss called to tell me the news about her cancelled trip) to sit down with my husband among the suitcases and do our weekly page from the Life Organizer where we decide how the days will be shaped in our minds, and hearts, and souls.

What will I let go of: learning Spanish

What could I do: Yoga

What do I have to do: breathe deeply

There’s so much more to mine from the weekly planning page than this, but the intention setting is priceless to me. Each time I’m faced with a decision...Should I go to yoga when I have so much to do? I check it against the intention I have set.

Should I walk my son to the bus and take a stroll up the road when I have to get to the office? Yes. Can I appreciate all the people who are helping me when my to do list is still unbearably long? Yes. Will I allow myself to be in AWE when the work that lies ahead is unfathomable? Yes.

And so, I say goodbye dear friends, and head out into the worldin AWE.

(Gulp.)

Kelly Salasin, April 7, 2001; 4 am.

(Note: this post is part of my Life Purpose Path series, from the Chicken Wing collection, here at Two Owls Calling. To read the previous post in the series, click here: The Lollipop Tree or the follow up post: April 19th

 

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